


both our hands speak for us (and complicate it)

by eelegy



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: F/F, Friends With Benefits, Rated 'T' for repeated used of the word 'pussy' in a humorous context, idolverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:15:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26123341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eelegy/pseuds/eelegy
Summary: Haseul and Vivi each navigate their confusing friends with benefits relationship in a very different way. Haseul isn't sure she's allowed to have more. Vivi knows what she wants, just not how to take it.Jinsoul is a friend, Sooyoung is a fiend, and Heejin and Hyunjin pillow fight once.
Relationships: Jo Haseul/Viian Wong | ViVi
Comments: 8
Kudos: 61
Collections: Girl Group Jukebox - Mixtape Round





	both our hands speak for us (and complicate it)

**Author's Note:**

> So, and I’m sorry, this fic is sorta based on two songs on a technicality. Felt This Way and Stay Away are two songs with the same lyrics next to each other on the same album. In Ms. Jepsen’s words, they deal with the feeling of “lust longing” in different ways: one is softer and full of emotion and the other is more assertive. Haseul is represented by Felt this Way and Vivi by Stay Away.

As cliché as it is, it starts on their first trip abroad. Haseul can't tell you more than that. All she knows is that one minute, she and Vivi are sitting against the headboard of one of the twin beds watching a silly romcom and the next, they're fully horizontal. Vivi’s hands are tangled in her hair and her tongue is in Vivi’s mouth. She's glad that in the time since she last kissed someone, she hadn't suddenly forgot. The old adage “it's like riding a bike” suddenly pops into her head and she laughs into Vivi's mouth at how bizarre it all is, pulling back for air, and, without thinking about it too much--she can't afford to--she lets Vivi pull her back in. And _fuck,_ Vivi is a good kisser.

She doesn't really process the fact that, maybe, making out with your coworker on a company trip is a bad idea until later that night. Vivi is fast asleep in her own bed and Haseul can hear the muffled sounds of Heejin and Hyunjin laughing at a slapstick comedy in the neighboring room. When it does hit her, she shoots up in bed, eyes wide. “Oh _fuck.”_

* * *

Vivi likes to consider herself a go-getter. When she wants something, there's little that can stop her from getting it. When she was five, she wanted a pet hamster, and so she convinced her parents that she would take full responsibility. Did she? Perhaps not, but who would trust a six-year-old with a sentient creature? The hamster lived 2 spoiled years. When she was twelve, she wanted the starring role in the secondary school musical, never mind that the role was reserved for older students. She got the role anyway. When she was sixteen, she walked into a modeling agency and walked out with her first gig.

And the first day she met Haseul, she knew she wanted her too. And Vivi is nothing but but a go-getter.

So she makes some advances. She's subtle about it, the lingering gazes and the way she lays her compliments on thick, often accompanied by a light arm touch or a sly wink. And yet, Haseul is dense. Vivi swears even Heejin, whose skull is thicker than the cell phone from Vivi's video, had caught on. She’d shoot curious glances at Vivi when Vivi would drag a finger down from Haseul's shoulder to her hand while complimenting the way she had filled in her eyebrows that day.

Maybe it was Haseul's desperation to make friends? From what Vivi could tell, entering a cliquey new high school halfway through her junior year had left Haseul a little...lacking in the friends department. Her tiny, bookish appearance and thick lenses, (exactly what Vivi found so, well, hot), probably helped her sink into the crowd. So Haseul had insisted on team bonding trips, all five of them going to ice cream parlors and art exhibits, sometimes inviting other trainees along too. As much as Vivi appreciated the assertive leadership, she was tired of inviting Haseul out for a little one-on-one bonding only to show up and see Haseul gabbing away with Yeojin and Jungeun.

* * *

So, Haseul is going crazy. Not, of course, that she wasn't already a little unhinged. Even she has to admit that the burden of leadership had turned her a little inside out. But having the hots for one of her very nice and very important members is a snag she hadn't been expecting. Every time she looks at Vivi, all she can think about is the way her lips feel and her hands in her hair. She wants to do it again. She really does, but professionalism is key.

Well! Haseul would be the first to admit that her self control isn't the strongest. Her impulsivity once led her to purchase an entire piece of furniture for Hyunjin over an offhand comment. That same impulsivity convinces her that pressing Vivi against the wall of the Fact In Star green room while Heejin and Hyunjin inspect the vending machine options is, in fact, a good idea.

In Haseul's defense, for what it's worth, it certainly _feels_ good, although maybe that's Vivi’s hands on her ass. Well, whatever it is, it silences the little nagging voice in Haseul's head going “are you serious? Getting some on company time?”

* * *

Vivi snaps. It was bound to happen. What would you do if the girl you'd been blatantly flirting with just doesn't get the message? After all, she's a go getter and that means she's gotta do the _getting_.

So, of course, she slides onto Haseul's bed in their hotel room in Hong Kong, aware of the muffled sounds of a pillow fight happening in the next room. Haseul is channel surfing, and Vivi takes the chance to really look at Haseul.

Vivi knows Haseul would let out a goofy laugh if Vivi tried to call her hot, but to Vivi, she's stupidly irresistible. From the curve of her eyelashes to the sharp angle of her jaw to the little fold in her ear that Haseul was charmingly proud of. And she's so small. Vivi knows she's small too, but something about the way Haseul is drowning in the pajamas she brought, and made even smaller by the way she's hunched forward...Well, Vivi kind of wants to mess her up.

So she hooks two fingers under Haseul’s chin and draws her in, pausing for a moment when they're an inch apart, giving Haseul an out. Haseul blinks once, and then surges forward, pushing Vivi down onto the bed. Huh! Vivi hadn't expected Haseul to be so assertive. She's always liked a challenge.

* * *

Haseul's never been, like, super “free love!” or anything, but it's not like she thinks chastity is a virtue either. She likes making out with Vivi. It's fun! And she's not by any stretch an adrenaline junkie, but the rush of breaking apart at the last minute is addictive. Like when Jungeun pokes her head into the kitchen to investigate the clattering of a set of metal chopsticks that Haseul had knocked to the ground when she hopped onto the counter to wrap her legs around Vivi’s waist. As soon as Jungeun determines that it’s just Vivi fixing up a midnight snack and shuffles off to bed, Haseul drags Vivi back in, breathless.

The point is, sneaking around is fun! Dare Haseul say it? It’s hot.

But that’s a problem because, like Icarus, Haseul had flown too close to the sun and now she’s avoiding Jinsoul like her life depends on it.

* * *

If Vivi were to list her hobbies, the list would be as follows: cooking, travel, exercise, and kissing. Her top two, cooking and kissing have one very important thing in common: Vivi loves getting people to react, and Haseul's reactions have quickly become her favorite of anyone she's ever kissed. She puts her all into kissing like she's got just seconds on the clock and is driving forward to the basket, not that either of them were necessarily tall enough to even think about basketball.

Even so, just kissing is not going to satisfy Vivi forever. She's wanted Haseul for months! This _is_ taking it at a snail's pace for her, and she's never been patient.

She has a feeling Haseul wants her too, but she's so damn responsible sometimes, and it drives Vivi insane. (There are five minute buffers between the ends of their sessions and the time they have to go onstage so they can fix their makeup. Even so, just once, Vivi would like to see what they can get away with. Would anyone catch smeared lipstick on a girl barely five feet tall at the back of an music show final stage?) Vivi has a feeling any hint of her wanting anything more than physical will send Haseul running, so, alas, she pushes it from her mind for the fourth time this week and swings her thigh over Haseul's lap on Haseul's bottom bunk.

* * *

Vivi shuts her eyes and keeps them closed while making out. She really does put 110% into just about everything she does, and it shows! But Haseul finds her eyes fluttering open mid-lip lock sometimes. When Vivi has her pinned to the kitchen table (it just happened, and who was Haseul to say no?!), she spots a wide-eyed Jinsoul frozen, towel in hand, on her way to the bathroom. Jinsoul is gone before Haseul can even break the kiss, but Haseul knows she didn’t just imagine it.

So she seeks Jinsoul out, if only to give her a quick and easy explanation. Like breathing exercises! Haseul had definitely read somewhere that kissing could be a good way to, uh, train up your lungs, right? Or maybe they weren't kissing at all! Maybe it was just that Vivi was so close because Haseul had gotten something in her eye and Vivi was trying to take it out! Well, Haseul is sure she would simply just know exactly what to say when Jinsoul is in front of her.

* * *

Vivi is feeling: Humiliated. She is not supposed to be the one doing the longing! That particular feeling should be reserved for saps like Jungeun, who is, at present, surreptitiously drying her eyes after a particularly emotional fight in the drama playing in the living room.

Vivi likes dramas, sure, and she came out here voluntarily, needing some background noise to distract her from the alienly romantic notions she was unwillingly entertaining. Ew. Romance. Still, the ugly sobbing from the fashion CEO who was just dumped by her deadbeat hookup who only wanted something physical was uncomfortably close to Vivi’s worst nightmare.

I mean, how _awkward_ would that be? Being in the same group as someone who knows the inside of your mouth intimately, who knows you like them more than they’ll ever like you, who--oh god, how _humiliating_. Vivi is the dumper, not the dumpee! This is a streak she has no intention of breaking. She’ll just, well, turn up the heat. Leave Haseul high and dry. Let her know what she _could_ have.

Perfect.

* * *

She finds Jinsoul on her bed working on an erector set, frowning over the instruction booklet, nuts and bolts each in their own neat piles. Jinsoul is like that--neat--despite her carefree demeanor. She is also very easy to convince of things when she’s building. Haseul is already counting this as a Big Win.

“So!” Haseul panics. “Uh...Ouch! My eye!” She belatedly slaps her hand to her eye, doubling over in mock pain. “I thought Vivi got the thing out of my eye back there in the kitchen, which is why she was so close!” Nailed it.

Jinsoul glances up at Haseul and back down to the manual. “Y'all’aight?”

“Yeah! Just a little, uh, ouch!” Okay, Haseul winces. Maybe she should just stop talking. “So I'm going to bed! Going to sleep it off!”

Jinsoul nods, still reading the instructions. Haseul is halfway out the door when Jinsoul calls out after her. “Oh yeah, like, what _are_ y'all?”

* * *

Vivi puts her plan in motion the next time Haseul pulls her into her bed breathlessly. She casually neglects to leave that little space between their bodies that they had wordlessly agreed to, letting her shirt ride up a little as she slides down a little to leave a hickey just below the neckline of Haseul’s shirt. Haseul won’t be able to wear v-necks for a few days.

Haseul groans and arches into Vivi’s mouth, carding a hand through Vivi’s hair and trying to ease her back up to her mouth.

Vivi acquiesces and slides back up as she ups the ante, toying with the hem of Haseul’s shirt, dragging her fingers over Haseul’s stomach to the jut of her hipbone, then slyly around back to grab at Haseul’s ass. Haseul bucks her hips reflexively, eking a moan into Vivi’s mouth.

Vivi sits up for a breather, still straddling Haseul, and she’s pleased at how furiously flushed Haseul is.

Haseul takes a second to get herself oriented and lets out an awkward chuckle, running her hand through her hair. “Geez, that was intense! Where’d that come from?”

Vivi shrugs. “I wanted to grab your ass. Is that okay?”

Haseul stifles an awkward cough at Vivi’s bluntness. “Y-yeah! I mean, c-can I...you know,” she gestures at where Vivi is seated on her thighs, “too?”

Vivi grins. “I want you to.”

Haseul, if possible, blushes even more furiously. “Oh, gee!”

* * *

Haseul tried out for a few small acting parts as a child. She never got any. For all her immeasurable talent and humility otherwise, Haseul has never been able to pull off any role for more than a minute or so. When she spins around and schools her face into what is hopefully nonchalance and not “Oh god, I, too, have no idea,” she is, well, not optimistic about her chances of having Jinsoul forget this whole thing.

She opens and closes her mouth and maybe she blacks out for a second because she phases back in and she’s finishing a sentence she only barely registers the start of: “-really like her.” Oh god, she’s so horny she’s going insane. Oh god, that _also_ just came out of her mouth.

Jinsoul’s eyebrows are at her hairline. She puts the manual to the side to get up, usher Haseul back into the room and onto her bed, and close the door.Jinsoul sits cross-legged facing Haseul, her project still in neat little piles between them. “The love doctor, Jung Jinsoul, is in.”

* * *

Vivi is beginning to see a flaw in her plan. Her whole strategy centered around leaving Haseul high and dry and wanting more, but she hadn’t factored in that she _too_ would be so unbearably horny. It’s like the tiny bit of escalation she’s introduced woke some ravenous monster deep within her. And it was that monster who wanted nothing more than to get Haseul out of the ruffly dress from their schedule that day.

How humiliating! She truly had not considered how her plan might backfire so dramatically. Haseul, as usual, had been completely oblivious to Vivi’s struggle, and maybe it’s a good thing. Haseul’s cocky streak would never let her live it down.

But she’s committed now, and she’d see her plan through. Vivi is _not_ a quitter. So she lets Haseul press her against the bathroom sink and tries not to think at all.

* * *

“So y’all, what? Fuck? And you’re in love now?”

Haseul blushes furiously. Jinsoul’s lazy drawl somehow makes it sound so much _worse._ “No! Well, kinda, but not, like.” Haseul lowers her voice, hissing the next part. “ _Fucking_.”

Jinsoul leans back on her pillows, grabbing a large plush bee from next to her bed, hugging it absentmindedly. “So y’all’re making out? Doing a little heavy petting? And you _wanna_ fuck?”

Haseul opens her mouth to deny it, but sees the hint of a sly grin on Jinsoul’s face. She’s teasing. Of course she is. Haseul shoves her lightly. “Jerk. I’m baring my heart!”

Jinsoul laughs. “Okay, but forreal. Who started the, er, relationship, and who’s been escalating it? Has Vivi changed the way she treats you in day to day interactions, or does she compartmentalize? How about who initiates your little, uh, sessions?”

Haseul is silent for a second in surprise. “You’re...actually asking really good questions.”

Jinsoul hums sagely. “I _did_ say the love doctor is in.”

“Well, Vivi kissed me first, grabbed my ass first-” Jinsoul stifles an awkward cough, but otherwise lets Haseul continue, “and she, well, maybe she winks at me all the time?” Haseul sighs, resting her head in her hand. “I don’t know what a wink means. A wink can mean anything.”

Jinsoul is solemn. “A wink _can_ mean anything. But what does it mean _here?_ That is the question.”

Haseul sighs. “I think it means ‘let’s make out.’ And then we do, so-”

* * *

Okay, Vivi officially has a new plan involving a miraculous escape from the dorm, a sneaky intimates shopping trip with Sooyoung (the only member who she knows will accompany her to the stores she wants to go to), and a late night practice room tryst with Haseul. If a subtle ramp up in intimacy wasn’t going to make Haseul snap, maybe a sexy little slap in the face in the form of a little private time would do the trick.

Now the only issue is being subtle enough about her true intentions to not reveal them to Sooyoung. And that’s harder than it sounds! Sooyoung is among the nosiest members, and is nimble with her words in a way that had pretty much any member spilling their guts within ten minutes.

“So,” Sooyoung rolls her head over to look at Vivi, sitting across the aisle from her on the bus. “What’s the occasion?” The bucket hat pulled low over her face means she had to tilt her head back to see Vivi.

Vivi is, for the first time ever, grateful for the way 90% of her face was hidden. “No occasion.” She keeps her voice even, she thinks. “Just a little bored and thought shopping would be fun.”

The bus arrives at their stop and they get off, Sooyoung silent until they’re among the murmur of people. “Shopping for lingerie on a Tuesday night a month after debut? Yeah, ‘no occasion’ my ass. So, who’s the dude.” Sooyoung tilts her head. “No, who’s the girl?”

Vivi opens and closes her mouth before giving up. “How are you so good at this?”

The corners of Sooyoung’s eyes crinkle. “I’m the best. Is it Jiwoo?”

Vivi coughs in surprise. _What?!_ “Jiwoo?! NO! Why?!”

Sooyoung shrugs casually. “You two have been all over each other. I just assumed you picked up on her little puppy dog crush.”

Vivi laughs. “There’s no way. She’s always been obsessed with you!”

“Yeah, and she can see other people. I don’t mind. I’m a modern woman.” Sooyoung spots a cafe stand across the street and points to it. “You mind if I get myself a drink? It’s Haseul then, isn’t it”

Vivi nods dumbly, not even totally sure what part of the series of statements she’s responding to.

* * *

“So wine her and dine her. Take her out to a nice little Cantonese restaurant. Talk about how much fun you had in Hong Kong.” Jinsoul pauses. “By the way, I _cannot_ believe you guys kept it so low key for so long. Y’all’re insane. Anyway, you gotta _tell_ her. Vivi’s silly. She’s probably trying to be as sexy as possible for you.”

Haseul groans. “Isn’t that the problem? I can’t think when she’s on me.”

Jinsoul purses her lips. “Then you’re gonna hafta maintain a buffer of space for the night. What’s the opposite of post-nut clarity? No nut clarity? Get summa that.”

Haseul groans. “Do you really have to be so crude? Vivi’s proper!”

Jinsoul snorts. “Yeah, she’s properly pinned you to the kitchen counter where we prepare our food for months.” She shakes her head. “Seriously hope you wiped it down after.”

Haseul throws the nearest plushie at Jinsoul’s head. “We haven’t even done anything in need of wiping!”

* * *

“Okay, so you’re telling me that you’re gonna convince her to fall in love with you from pussy game alone?”

Vivi winces at Sooyoung’s crude wording. “Well, when you put it like that, it sounds stupid.”

“Far from it. That’s how I bagged Jungeun and Jiwoo.” Sooyoung takes a long sip of her coffee as Vivi chokes on her own.

“ _And?!_ Jesus, how many girls are you sleeping with?” Vivi hisses out, trying her best to not draw more attention to them than her coughing already had.

Sooyoung looks unconcerned. “I told you, I’m a modern woman,” she says simply. “Anyway, back to my point. You’ve gotta have her alone for some one on one time, emphasis on the ‘on’.” Sooyoung wiggles her eyebrows, which are barely visible under her brim. “Oh, do you want me to teach you this little tongue trick I can do that drives J-”

“Oookay! Thanks for the help Sooyoung,” Vivi interrupts, glancing around to make sure no one had taken interest in their conversation, “but all I need help with is what set looks the best on me.”

Sooyoung blinks, twice. Then she grins. “Good thing I’m an expert in great tits.”

* * *

Haseul wipes her sweaty palms on her jeans again as she sits on the couch, waiting for Vivi to finish getting ready. The Uber is just pulling up outside. Her nice, fancy date outfit is mitigated by the baseball cap pulled low over her eyes and the mask in her hand. Haseul wipes her hands again, wincing at how the sweat is already seeping through her jeans enough to make her legs clammy.

Haseul springs up when she hears Vivi’s voice. “Okay! I’m ready! Let’s go, sexy!”

Haseul flushes red at the nickname. Then she sees Vivi. It takes all she has in her to croak out a, “You look good.” Jinsoul snorts from behind a book in the adjoining dining area. Haseul wipes her hand one more time and hopes to god her sweat reflex will stop out of sympathy as she reaches for Vivi’s hand.

Vivi, to her credit, doesn’t even glance at their joined hands, just giving a squeeze and letting Haseul tug her in the direction of the door.

Once they’re in the car, Haseul realizes that she’s gonna have to start speaking more than the nervous one word answers she’d given Vivi all the way down to the Uber. She clears her throat. “So, um,” Fuck, Haseul, think _._ “Clouds are. Made of water?”

Vivi looked over at her, brows furrowed. “Is that, um, new information for you?”

Haseul winces. “No. I just saw them and thought of it. I think it’s an important fact to...have on hand..?” Oh, Haseul, she thinks to herself, please stop talking.

Vivi blinks then giggles. “I’ll keep that in mind. Never know when that will be the winning trivia question, I suppose.” Then she leans in, letting her voice go a little lower, “You may have just saved my life.” She slides a hand over Haseul’s under the hem of her shirt.

Haseul gulps. Oh boy!

* * *

Sooyoung’s invaluable advice, which she’d given Vivi in the dressing room of the lingerie store while adjusting the straps of Vivi’s third option, had been to make Haseul do nothing but think about sex all night.

“You want her all over you once you get to the room. Show her the night of her life. Be up before her and cooking breakfast when she wakes up. She feels sore before you come in and take care of her. Flawless plan. Works every time.”

Vivi has questions, namely who the hell cooks breakfast in a hotel kitchen, but Sooyoung does seem to know what she’s talking about, so Vivi takes mental notes.

* * *

Haseul is beginning to regret the corner booth she’d reserved as Vivi’s hand trails a little higher up her thigh. She squeaks through the order, bungling pronunciation she had practiced the night before as Vivi drags her fingers along the inseam of her jeans. The server is mercifully oblivious and manages to understand Haseul though her multiple voice cracks. She allows herself a relieved breath after he leaves.

Vivi slides away innocently and grabs her lip tint from her clutch to do a quick touch up. Haseul can’t help but stare as Vivi purses her lips. How could she? This whole thing started because of those lips.

“So,” Haseul starts, fiddling with the edge of the tablecloth, “Beautiful night, huh? Lots of,” she stops and tries to think of anything she saw during the ride over, but all she remembers is Vivi’s hand on her skin, “clouds?”

Vivi nods, humoring her. “Clouds are made of water.”

“Yeah. Pretty wet, huh?” Haseul takes a drink of water to shut herself up. Come on, Haseul! You’re the best conversationalist you know, with the exception of Yeojin. You can do better!

But the water comes flying out of her nose at Vivi’s next line. “You wanna be wet too?”

The sound Haseul makes can only be described as a honk.

* * *

Vivi looks down at the table where the wood is showing through beneath the wet tablecloth. Thankfully, very little water got on either of them.

Vivi takes this as a sign to slow down, maybe. Haseul might require a more delicate touch, more so than Jungeun, who is combative at every turn, and Jiwoo, who goes with the flow to an almost ridiculous degree. Perhaps Sooyoung’s plan _wouldn’t_ work with Haseul, who could barely sit through a sex scene in a movie without laughing nervously every ten seconds.

She pats Haseul on the back and hands her the napkin from the set across the table.

* * *

“Sorry about that. I just,” Haseul blinks at the spreading puddle that she is trying to blot at, barely registering the way Vivi is gently patting Haseul’s pants with her own napkin. Well, she’d already done some damage, might as well embarrass herself some more. “I actually had a whole plan. Jinsoul helped me with it.”

Haseul looks up at Vivi, who had finished with Haseul’s lap and is a safe distance away. Vivi nods, waiting for her to continue.

Haseul presses ahead before she can fully comprehend the weight of what she is about to do. “Yeah, so I really like making out with you, and all the other stuff, and I guess, maybe, I think I like you, too..?” She trails off, mind a little fuzzy with anxiety. She keeps her eyes locked on her work drying the table.

* * *

“Wait, what?” Vivi stops reimagining her grand ‘Make Haseul Horny’ plan to stare at the woman herself. “It’s-it’s that simple?”

Haseul looks up from her work drying the table to blink blankly at Vivi. “What?”

“Huh?” Vivi stares back.

They sit in silence for a few seconds before Vivi finally has the words to respond.

“Oh, we’re both stupid, aren’t we?”

Haseul is folding the wet napkin to set aside. “So, you,” she pauses, “like me too? Just to be clear.”

Vivi laughs at the absurdity of this whole situation and the fact she’d been suffering through a wedgie all evening just for Haseul to beat her to confessing. “Yeah, Haseul. I like you too.” Then she sighs in mock disappointment, fighting a smirk.

Haseul is keyed up almost immediately, tense and concerned. “What’s wrong, did I-”

Vivi schools her expression into her best poker face. “You hijacked my plan to woo you, so,” She subtly fixes her shirt so the barest hint of pink lace peeks out. “I’ve been wearing this lingerie all night, and there’s a hotel room ready for us twenty minutes away. But since you beat me to it, I guess I’ll call and cancel th-”

“WELL-” Haseul interrupts, voice a bit too loud for the restaurant, causing a couple of people to glance over at their table. She ducks her head sheepishly and whispers the next part. “I don’t see why we should just let all that effort go to waste. I’m nothing if not economical…” The waver in Haseul’s voice gives away her fake nonchalance.

Vivi smirks.

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/folklorbit)


End file.
